of course i know that most of you are aquainted with the art of
BDSM and bondage,.. however for the unitiated i always like to
play safe ,so i have listed some golden rules and short explanations




EXPLANATION OF BONDAGE (BDSM)
Couples and bondage
THE RULES
Start with a committed relationship with a lot of trust and plenty of sexual activity together.
Talk things through first.
Start slow and easy.
Take turns being the one being tied up.
Take the simple safety precautions listed above.
Never use bondage as an opportunity to subject the tied partner to a form of sex that they do not normally consent to.
THE FACTS
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The fact that mainstream ‘high street’ adult shops find it worthwhile to also stock some bondage equipment suggests that some otherwise ‘vanilla’ couples incorporate elements of bondage into their sex lives at some point in their relationships. Leaving aside those couples who are themselves part of the BDSM ‘community’, the use of bondage within couples tends to be very different from and separate from that normally associated with BDSM. Couples’ private bondage games largely take place behind closed doors, and constitute foreplay, usually as a prelude to the couple having sex. There may or may not be some elements of dominance and submission involved as part of role play, but sadism and/or masochism rarely play any part unless the couple already have such leanings. This contrasts with activity in the BDSM subculture, where the emphasis is often more on bondage for its own sake, frequently ending in masturbation only, or indeed involving no sexual contact at all. These differences can lead to misunderstanding if couples who have tried private bondage games encounter the BDSM subculture. Trusting couples can't understand the need for safe-words, while the members of the subculture can't understand why couples mainly see bondage as a part of sexual intercourse.
Bondage within couples usually involves one partner being voluntarily tied-up or put into restraints (i.e. bound / cuffed / spread-eagled etc) by the other, who then either sexually pleasures the tied partner (using manual masturbation, oral sex, vibrating sex toys etc.); or has sex with them while they are restrained, or of course both. The erotic appeal is often in the form of feedback from the writhing / struggles / vocalizations etc of the tied partner. The tied partner may derive pleasure from being in a largely ‘helpless’ predicament in the hands of a trusted partner, and the other may enjoy the mild domination involved in having their partner in that predicament. Either way, many established couples find playing bondage games relationship-affirming, as they both require and imply a level of trust between the partners that is not normally found within more casual relationships, as well as being a shared ‘private’ facet of their sex life that most couples prefer to keep just between the two of them.
This form of bondage has its own niche on some internet websites, where images and movies usually depict voluntarily-tied models undergoing inescapable intense sexual pleasuring, rather than any menace, force or pain. Safety rules followed by couples are frequently context - and trust - based. As the tied partner will more often than not be held in a submissive sex position, sex therefore takes place with their pre-agreed consent. For example a still photograph taken out-of-context at that moment would suggest a very different story to that of a consensual sex game / mutual rape fantasy enactment etc.
Technique
==================
Bondagehooks.
Handcuffs can be used to cuff ankles as well, sometimes even toe cuffs are usedBondage can be divided into six main categories:
Bondage that pulls parts of the body together (rope, straps, harnesses).
Bondage that spreads parts of the body apart (spreader bars, x-frames).
Bondage that ties the body down to another object (such as chairs or stocks).
Bondage that suspends the body from another object (suspension bondage).
Bondage that restricts normal movement (hobble skirts, handcuffs, pony harness).
Bondage that wraps the whole body or a part of it in bindings such as cloth or plastic (saran wrap or cling film "mummification") as well as sleepsack bondage.
Some of the large variety of restraints used in bondage:
Rope, often preferred because of its flexibility. Rigging, however, requires considerable skill and practice to do safely.
Chains, including police handcuffs, thumbcuffs and belly chains.
Institutional restraints, including straitjackets.
Purpose-made bondage gear, such as monogloves, sleepsacks, bondage hooks and bondage tables.
Some simple bondage techniques:
Verbal bondage, in which (as the name suggests) the top simply tells the bottom to do something.
Simply tying the hands together in front or behind.
Anchoring the hands to the front, back or sides of a belt at the waist.
A spread eagle, with the limbs splayed out and fastened by wrists and ankles to bedposts, door frame or some other anchoring point.
A hogtie securing each wrist to its corresponding ankle behind the back (wider, padded restraints such as bondage cuffs are recommended for this).
The crotch rope involves pulling a rope between the labia to apply pressure to the female genitals. Sometimes a knot is placed in the rope at the position of the clitoris to intensify the sensation.
Some more complex techniques:
The reverse prayer position (not recommended unless the subject has flexible shoulders).
An over-arm tie, in which the arms are brought over the head, and the wrists fastened together behind the head and then by a length of rope, chain or strapping to a belt at the waist.
There are also some common fantasy settings in which bondage is often played:
Rape, ravishment and/or abduction: The top fictitiously seizes or abducts the consenting bottom and has complete control to do what he/she pleases.
Dominance/slavery: A training session occurs in which rewards for obedience and punishment for defiance are given. Humiliation is usually involved.
Predicament bondage: The bottom is given a choice between two tortures. For example, caning on the rear or flogging on the chest. If the bottom cannot stand one any longer, the top will start the other. This can also be done mechanically, like having a bottom squat and rigging a crotch rope to tighten if they attempt to stand.
Bondage is often combined with other sexual and BDSM techniques. See list of bondage positions and list of bondage equipment for more details.
Technique in self-bondage is more complex, involving special methods to apply the bondage to oneself, and also to effect a release after a lapsed period of time. Self-bondage is also notably risky: see the safety notes below.
Safety
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Many people regard bondage as safe when conducted between sober, trusted partners who are fully aware of the risks involved and the precautions necessary to ensure safety. Partners who are in committed relationships may have a greater basis for trusting each other. Performing acts in a supervised location, such as a dungeon, closet, forest, or with a group of trusted friends may also increase safety.
There is also a subculture of people who seek out others interested in bondage and pursue such activities with people who they do not know well. This subculture has given rise to the safe, sane and consensual credo.
Safety precautions include:
The use of a "safeword," or some clear way for the subject to indicate genuine distress and a wish to abort.
Never leaving a bound person alone.
Avoiding positions or restraints which may induce postural asphyxia.
Making sure that the subject changes positions at least once an hour (to avoid circulation problems).
Making sure that the subject can be released quickly in an emergency.
Avoiding restraints which impair breathing. (Gags or hoods which block the mouth can become asphyxial hazards if the subject vomits or the nose becomes otherwise blocked.)
Remaining sober; alcohol and drugs should be avoided.
One very simple safety measure is to ask the subject every so often if he or she is all right. Another is to check body parts like hands and feet for numbness or coldness, which can happen if nerves have been pinched or blood circulation has been blocked. Another is to check for skin discoloration. Skin that does not get enough oxygen turns bluish. If blood can get in, but can't get out because one of the veins has been blocked, that part of the body turns purple.
If the subject has been gagged or can otherwise not verbally communicate, a different form of the safeword is needed. For instance, they may hum a simple tune, or opening and closing one or both hands repeatedly, or releasing an object held in one hand(such as a rubber ball, or a scarf).
Some simple preparations may also be helpful:
Food. It is surprisingly common for people (especially those on diets) to faint during a long session. Having a regular meal beforehand is recommended; being fed small snacks during play may also help avoid fainting.
Cutting tools. A pair of EMT scissors is recommended (useful for safely cutting rope and tape off skin).
Keyed-alike padlocks, if chains are being used.
please always play SAFE